The 21st again

First things first: Here’s to our first 8 months of marriage!  

 

This year is flying by.  We’ll be celebrating our anniversary before you know it.  Too bad last year didn’t go as quickly as this year seems to be.

My workdays crawl by but my free time goes by in a whirlwind.  I love our weekends far too much.  I just suffer through the week to get to Friday night….where there is usually beer, a puppy, and my baby waiting for me.

What’s that you say?  Don’t I also have two cats waiting for me when the weekends (or even the week night) call?  Well, you’d think so, wouldn’t you?  I do still possess to fuzzy little cat babies.  Sadly, though, they chose to be completely excluded from us at this point because of the dog.  Oliver hides in his room.  Stinker hides on the counter-height chairs that are pushed under our kitchen table.  I have to seek them out if I want to pet them or even say hello.  

 

Perhaps someday they’ll reappear and rejoin the family.  I do miss seeing them.

Gamer girl?

I played in my third D&D session on Saturday.  

Full disclosure: I have my own dice, and I picked them out myself.  I made my own character (with a lot of help but she’s definitely of my creation).  I have laughed at insider D&D jokes on at least three separate occasions.   I used the proper language when talking with someone outside of my husband’s gaming circle.  I hate to admit this, but all the signs point to me being a gamer.  Even our best man agreed that this is the case.  The same best man that put me up to this.  

I’ll also admit that my sweet, sweet husband - in order to ensure that he did not have to live with a whiny, unpleasant, all around b*tchy wife - gave me ample opportunity to BACK OUT of this obligation.  But I didn’t.  Not because I thought I’d like it.  Oh no!  It was more out of curiosity and in the spirit of sharing in what the other person loves.  He does, after all, dress up and go to Renaissance festivals with me.  I’d tolerate it being in my house, but that is a far cry from sharing in it.  

Trust me, I’m far more shocked than anyone else that I’ve actually enjoyed my experiences gaming.  I’m learning what I like and dislike (less talky; more fighty!) and even find myself thinking “what would my character’s reaction be to this situation?” when making decisions that shape our next moves.  I love that, occasionally, I get a joke that no one else seemed to get, or a high five for an awesome move.  I enjoy being included in (instead of just listening to) the conversations after the fact.  I am enjoying being a part of my husband’s story instead of a constant spectator, a roll which I had very often struggled with.  

Gaming is my husband’s greatest passion. (If it isn’t, I’ve been sorely misled!)  It means too much to him for me to continue to turn a blind eye to it.  My hope for playing, overall, is that we get to share some fun stories and spend time together…and just maybe I’ll be a little contributing factor to the thing that makes him the happiest.  

Technology at its finest

This was scheduled to post on Thursday, but for some reason, it never did.  So, here you are....a couple days late.

Speaking of technology from yesterday….

Okay, so I was WELL behind the times.  But I made it work.  And thankfully, dating still works, even when you only have dial-up.  

I’m sure most of you know that I only tried online dating on a dare.  Well, rather, to prove someone that told me it was THE way to meet people wrong.  Yeah, both he and I are married to people we met on a little site called Match.  Those cheesy commercials?  They can happen.  We’re proof!  So are two of our friends that met on eHarmony and were in our wedding party together.   

Since I only did it to prove that you can’t find a suitable, dateable person; you can imagine my surprise when it only took two weeks to find Mr. Right.  I’m not saying it happens that way for everyone.  My husband was on it for quite some time and had a string of really bad first dates.  Thank God he persevered.  I’ve since become the self-proclaimed poster child for online dating.  Why did I ever doubt this would work?!  Ehm….probably because I was so far behind on the technological front that I still had dial-up…..in 2008.  Maybe?

As the self-proclaimed poster child, I feel compelled to tell you that if you’re single and skeptical of dating sites…..I challenge you to give it your best shot.  Let me be the person you want to prove wrong!  And if you do, please let me know how it goes.    
 

All the pretty things

We saw some gorgeous things while camping.

Pretty things.

There were also so not-so-pleasant things that I chose not to capture on film.  These happen to be the rabble-rousing drunkards and illegal mesquite tree harvesters that kept us up ALL NIGHT.  Don't get me wrong, we had a beer with dinner.  We also gathered mesquite FROM THE GROUND for our fire.  We also didn't expect everyone to be as sleepy as we were and go to bed before 10.  But when we woke up at 12, 2, and 4am from the sounds whooping or an electric saw, we were no longer happy campers.  We were dang tired campers!  This might just be further proof that we're old, but I don't think it's absurd to think that people should be sleeping after 2am.  Or at the very least, not be harvesting anything from the park! 

This is the last of the photos, I promise.  See you tomorrow with my goodies from this weekend's baking! 

Riley camped.

To say that Riley enjoyed herself would be a slight understatement.  She hiked, ate a tree, and slept in a tent with us!  She played SO hard.  That lead to sleeping equally hard.

She has such a good time.  Can't wait to take her again!

Riley camped.

We camped

Sorry I made you wait an extra day.  I was just too tired yesterday to sort through photos. 

We headed north to Davis, OK for a night.  Aside from camping to go to a Renaissance festival, since 1999.  Now, I've camped in at TRF and the Colorado Renaissance Festival since then, but those had the ultimate goal of going to a festival.  I wasn't completely sure I would enjoy it outside of the excitement of doing one of my favorite activities.  My husband hadn't camped in any form since high school.  So, neither of us were very sure we'd like it.  We went anyway.  Hey, there's only one way to find out, right?!  Turner Falls was one of my favorite campsites when I was young, so it seemed a good place to start.

We camped.  

I'll show you some of the fun scenery and, of course, the puppy soon! 

Early mornings

I got up at six this morning with Ms. Restless Wiggle Butt herself. Seems Riley has her own little body clock going for her. She's usually out of bed and playing by 6am, and it being Saturday did not make one ounce of difference to her!

Thankfully, 6am is still sleeping in by an hour for me. Not as much "make up" sleep as I'd hoped for though, considering the last three nights were sleepless.

Riley's restlessness and being up all night ill from a vaccination weren't the only things keeping me awake those nights though. I wasn't able to quiet my mind long enough to sleep. That comes and goes for me. And it happens far, far less now that I have such a great man in my life. But it still happens occasionally.

The last three nights I've felt as restless as Riley in her kennel at 6:01. The need for a change feels strong and imminent. Perhaps soon, a door will open. Or heck, someone crack a window. I'm willing to work to pry it the rest of the way open!

Until then....I have the farmers market, a girls' lunch, and celebratory dinner with my husband! Oh what, you think I'd forget that we've been married for six months as of today?! Not a chance.

And so, I leave you with this....

Memory Lane

So, I decided to go through our photos for today's post. Here's the little gem I came up with for you all!

This was March 6, 2008 - three weeks after I'd met my husband-to-be on a "blind" date (a.k.a. Match.com date). My job has a policy that we don't really shut down for weather related issues....um, ever. I was at work when it started snowing. A little snow is no big deal. Snow coming down as heavy and fast as this WAS a big deal. When we were finally released, three hours after the snow had been falling heavily, the damage was already done. Every highway was a disaster area. Most were completely still. Work is 40 miles from where my boyfriend was. My house was closer, but I lived in a cabin in the woods where you can literally see the outdoors through cracks in the walls in some spots. My house would literally be too cold for me to sleep in during a storm like this.


It took me over three hours to reach his duplex. I literally broke down and cried half way there. I called everyone I could think of to get me through the madness of sitting in traffic and sliding off the road until my phone ran dead.

But when I got there.....he hugged and kissed me and we played in the snow.....where I got a snowball directly to the face! Um....oops?!


I had the next day off for a doctors visit; a follow up to see if I had cancer. Which I don't. But that's why I remember the date so well. A bittersweet day made better solely because of this cute guy I was falling in love with, only I'm not sure we really knew it yet!

Family

The vet sent us a thank you note last week after Riley's visit. It was a pretty generic note; they even stamped the inside of the card with a rubber stamp instead of writing the name of the clinic.

But they did hand-write the address. It was addressed to our family, not just me or even Riley. This caught my husband aback so much so that he had to show me the envelope when I got home.

I asked if he'd never considered that just by marrying me, he did indeed have a family. He said it had never really occurred to him until that moment.

I guess as women, if we chose to take our husband's names, we have to change SO MANY DOCUMENTS that maybe we take for granted that it sinks in faster for us. The only thing that changed for him was a piece of really cool jewelry....until last week when he realized he had a new little family all his own.

Awesome moment.

In case you wondered...

.....what on earth food and cooking has to do with a blog about planning a marriage and being in a relationship, I'll tell you my take on it.

In my family, food is a way to show someone you care about them. Many, many times, I've passed along a pan of enchiladas or lasagna or peanut noodles AS A GIFT to my mom, grandparents, brother, uncles....you name it....for a birthday or anniversary gift. At Christmas, I often hand out homemade goodies. While I'm sure that practice happens a lot at holidays, I'm not so sure that spinach enchiladas count as a "really awesome gift" in many other families than mine (and yes my grama asked for them almost every time I see her). I think somewhere along the lines, my family decided that feeding a person was the ultimate gesture of love.

As a wife, I cook a lot. One, it's cheaper, and I'm a cheapskate. Two, it's healthier, and I want us to be vital and happy together for a really long time. Three, I love him immensely, and I can think of no better way of showing him every day. So, I generally make all three meals. Now, he's still just a cereal guy, but I usually take it to his study in the morning. I pack both of our lunches almost every day complete with snacks for the day. And dinner is usually the focus of the evening. It's no wonder that my fancy/splurge gadgets are kitchen devices, no?

So, that's why you see so much about food on my blog. How do you show affection?

A year ago today....

He gave me this...........

And asked if he could turn it into this............

In case you didn't guess, I meant the ring, not the beer!

It was a Wednesday, just an ordinary Wednesday, in the middle of an ordinary week. He insisted that we do our monthly trip to BJs Brewhouse to celebrate our first date, even though we were a week late and had been out of town visiting his parents. We did our usual appetizer and a nice brew, then left. On our way out the door, he muttered "are you sure you wanna marry me....I'm kind a dork" (Word substituted as what he really said could be offensive.....and I'm not looking to offend anyone today.) I said that was why I loved him, so yes. He walked me to my car, gave me a longer-than-usual "see you at home" kiss.....and started sinking to his knee. Sadly, I'll never know exactly what he would have said, because I didn't let him get all the way down there nor did I let him ask. In my excitement, I squealed and snatched the ring. It was on my finger in less than a second without the box even being fully opened. Um....oops? What can I say; I got excited. And stayed excited.

4 months!

Yesterday marked four months of marriage. That means that today, four months ago, we were getting off a plane in Baltimore, MD, very late at night.....and waiting over an hour for the shuttle (which broke down and had to be replaced) to take us to our hotel.

I loved Baltimore. It had a nice bustle to it without feeling scary or too fast. I am, after all, still a bit of a country girl. Since I'm wishing we were back there today. I thought I'd share a few highlights.

Happy hour at Mich O'Shea's....our favorite spot there.

Cheesing outside of Ace of Cakes.....which was incredibly difficult to find and it was COLD out! But we promised my uncle a photo in front of it.

Pre-flight-home lunch at a The Ale House on Pratt Street that does great English style ales. Pretty right? I had an Irish, and he had a hand-pumped ale.

Highly recommend going to Baltimore if you ever get the chance. It's a unique, beautiful, culture-filled city, and I'm glad we spent a blissed-out week walking ALL OVER it.

Why my husband ♥'s me?

Go read for yourself........

Pubs are Us

We ended our engagement session at the pub on the square. They literally let us take over the joint! The even recommended other areas in the pub to shoot in. How cool is that?


I was a little worried that engagement photos with beers in our hands was a bit too much, but honestly, I love these shots. Even if they're really just for us than anyone else.

We were literally blocking servers. I don't know why they put up with us! They'd just wait patiently with trays of food.



I know that some people think that engagement sessions are something easy to cut out to save money. As frugal as I was, this was simple a must for me. I wanted to have some great non-wedding photos of us. Plus, we really got to know our photographer (very important as she was in the room with me when I got dressed, so being comfortable with her and all the other ladies in the room really helped me stay even-keel). We were with her for two hours. We're not in front of cameras often, so it really helped us loosen up and made us both more comfortable with having one pointed at us for extended periods. And honestly, I LOVE the photos. Totally worth the money.

Photos by A Love Story Photography.

Engaging times

We had WAY too much fun for our engagement session. We went to an old downtown square with a great bookstore featuring rare and first editions book! Please take note of the books we're holding.


This was after we finally loosened up after getting used to a camera aimed at us!


Love, love, love this staircase.

Looks like a staircase to my new life.

And us being total goofballs, hoping this person didn't open his front door to ask what the heck we thought we were doing.

Photos by A Love Story Photography....more to come!

Wonderful weekend

This weekend was like the definition of why I wanted to marry my husband. We spent the whole weekend together - a rarity - and it was just so lovely. We stayed in Friday night, munching on our favorite smoked cheddar from Metzler's. Saturday, we left for Scarborough very early to try to beat some of the heat. It was pirate weekend, and we embraced it! The hubby even whipped up a braided rope belt because he felt it was far more appropriate and wore a head wrap that I made from remnants last Halloween. I was all leather and lace. We walked through the fairground, usually hand and hand. It was just so comfortable and fun. We treated ourselves to BJs pizza on the way back to officially celebrate our three month's married mark! But Sunday is really why we work. We started cleaning the house together at 8 in the morning (we'd been up several hours, so don't think we jumped out of bed and started cleaning). We worked together to get some of the problem areas cleared up (finally). Later in the afternoon, when the house was all tidy, we lounged on the couch together, strewn with kitties. Then we crafted together - me beading at one side of the table, him painting on the other side. Then dinner and more lounging. That lazy at-home time when no one else is around is priceless, and it's what I look forward to every week. Sometimes we don't get it, but we do try to make sure we get it.

I hope Monday goes smoothly!

Date night

So, Friday treats have dwindled a bit. We still have them, but they're not quite as grand as they had been in the past. This week, I had a very strong desire for one thing. A date. An honest to goodness date. A friend had a wonderful first date, the kind that makes you glow with happiness and excitement, this week. It made me so very nostalgic for when my honey and I met for the first time. I remember the excitement and the nerves. I remember talking very, very fast because I was so jittery. We talked and talked, so much so that the waitress couldn't get us to make an order for lack of reading the menu for over an hour. It was the best date I'd ever had, hands-down!

So, after seeing my friend all aflutter, I really wanted to go on a date too. Just.....you know, with my husband. Perhaps that's odd, but I love going on dates with him still. We haven't really gone out much lately. That's partly because we've been watching our pennies since we bite the bullet with the car. But even more importantly, we haven't had the time. Our Saturdays have been so packed that we don't have the energy to do anything on Sunday. So, I thought we'd sneak up on the drain of Saturday and go out on Friday night. And it worked! We had a lovely meal and a pitcher of Harp at our favorite neighborhood English pub. The we walked around this epic bookstore near the restaurant. Great evening. Just want I needed. Some alone time, out, talking and talking with the man I love.

Alone time

I debated and actually sort of agonized over whether my husband and I should spend the night before our wedding apart. Did we want to tempt the fabled "bad luck" of seeing each other on our wedding day? It really came down to two issues.

First I had to research the tradition to decide if it even made any sense for us and who we are as a couple. That's how I decided whether or not to use almost every tradition attached to weddings. After a little digging, it turned out that brides and grooms were kept separate so that one party could not change their mind at the last minute based on looks in arranged marriages where the betrothed couples had never met. This is not an arranged marriage. The tradition of this stand point seemed lacking. I believe in our culture today, we're suppose to be kept separate to keep us from fighting out of stress. Again, if we can't work together during stressful occasion, we don't need to be getting married yet. Life is stressful, after all, and I chose to seek him out in times of stress, not avoid him.

Once tradition was thrown out the window, we had to look at practicality. I know that waiting to see him at the head of the aisle for the first time that day would have been far more dramatic and climactic. Other brides have told me that they didn't think they'd get the much of a reaction if they'd seen their groom all day leading up to that. So, I worried I was robbing us of this feeling. Worse, I worried I was robbing our guests of witnessing that heightened emotion. Semantics would have been a nightmare though. We did not hire coordinators. Our family and friends pulled together to set up the venue in an hour and a half....part of which I had to disappear to put my dress on and finish my hair. Our venue was a wide, open space. There was no way for us to both be in the venue at the same time without seeing each other. The practicality of avoiding one another seemed even more stressful than coming together to make this wedding ROCK.

After much thought and many conversations with one another, we decided that we really didn't want to be apart during one of the most exciting days of our relationship so far. No energy was put into staying away from each other. It actually added to the calmness of our day. It was a wonderful decision for us, and it lead to one of my favorite mornings ever.

Friday updates and a memory

So, my little herb garden has bloomed are starting to be come recognizable plants. Unfortunately, they look a little pale and weak. I'm afraid my kitchen window sill just isn't allowing the little guys enough good, hearty sunlight. The problem is that I don't have a convenient space outside for my little babies. What's a girl to do?! Get a UV lamp? Has anyone done that?

I am so proud of my workout accomplishments this week! I did two hour-long belly dance practice sessions and an hour Latin fusion dance class plus 2000m on a rowing machine this week. I think that's a decent week's worth of exercise, don't you? And my reward for this effort......? I gained half a pound. (Insert expletives here.) Are you kidding me?! Ugh. Oh well.


Now for the memory....I think this one is appropriate, as Scarborough opens tomorrow. This was Memorial Day 2008. I was in sheer heaven. We were all freshly in love. We'd been together three months. It was a completely wonderful, carefree feeling. We're standing in the field in front of my cabin for these photos. It was such a good day!

Hello again!

Did you miss me?

Well, I'm a Mrs. now! We're back from Baltimore, much more relaxed and refreshed. I think I'll start off by sharing some of my absolute favorite little memories from the wedding. Hope that works for you. :)

• My uncle's speech 7 minutes before our ceremony that nearly made me bawl....until he ended it with "and now you have 5 minutes to curtain", very matter-of-fact-ly which made me burst out laughing instead of crying.
• Champagne shooters with the girls before we walked.
• My groom mouthing that I looked pretty at the end of my walk.
  
• The mic kicking in on the word "madness" at our ceremony.
• The speeches. Wow. I truly love my best friend and my groom's best friend.
  
• Picking up the first dance right where the audio died on the first try.
• Line dancing and a country swing.
• Kicking back with our bridal party after everyone else had fled the wedding early (definitely a hazard of a Sunday wedding).

To have everyone there and involved was worth all the stress and hassle. Not for something between him and I, but between us and all of them. There was joy. Overwhelming and unselfishly given. More joy than I could ever imagine.

Photo snagged from a friend's facebook of one of our tables in the reception area.